Here’s the thing, I’ve always been a fat lass, I even thought I was a fat lass when I wasn’t really one at all. I’m a size 16-18 and I don’t have a problem with that – I’ve never wanted to be thin and bikini ready BUT I am now 44 and I have a few concerns about my weight…
- the perimenopause is creeping into my life and I am often tired, hot and irritable – so I guess nobody will notice anything different as I try to ditch the sugar and boost my energy levels
- as I get older my metabolism is going to slow meaning I could get bigger, which I don’t want
- we lose muscle as we get older, so I need to start using them more or lose them
- I am feeling unfit and I don’t want to start feeling old
- I am scared of causing diabetes or other health problems because I can’t control what I shove in my gob
- and, on a purely superficial level, I am sick of my clothes
me and food
I like food and I treat myself with food – I’ll just have this because I am tired, fed-up, depressed and even when I happy. It has also been a self-destructive thing for me – I have previously been known to binge or eat rubbish food because of my low self esteem – I have worked through a lot of issues over the last couple of years and that has now gone but I am very aware that I have to develop a better relationship with good food.
I actually eat pretty well – lots of fresh veg, fruit and salad, cooking from scratch and hardly any processed food and fast food but I do snack, I do nibble on cake and biscuits, I do drink wine and I can snack late.
me and exercise
I DON’T LIKE IT VERY MUCH but I know I need to move my body more and I need to do what I enjoy rather than forcing myself to do some bootcamp bollocks that I will hate every second of.
I like walking, I like doing step and I like going on my bike – real and exercise.
me and stress
I juggle a lot with work and family and I can rush around a lot in-between sessions and clients. I am working on this because when I am on holiday I lose weight – I also eat less, swim and walk more on holiday but I am not stressed and I am convinced this is a factor.
So, how am I going to tackle this?
I am not going to follow a program such as Weight-Watchers or Slimming World, I am going to make it up as I go along and be more mindful about what I am eating.
I also need to make sure I don’t miss meals – I used to always skip breakfast and I can miss lunch on busy days which then makes me feel like I am starving and that’s when I either jump into the biscuit tin or the bread bin.
I have spent time thinking about how I eat, what I eat and my triggers for bad eating habits and it is these I need to change. But I also know that I need to move my ass more to lose weight, I can’t and shouldn’t do this with food alone.
- I need to walk and exercise more – I know this works for me and I’m hoping my little Fitbit is going to help keep me on track
- My main meals are pretty good but the regular unhealthy snacks have to go
- I don’t want to eat late in the day
- I need several days without the booze – I only usually have a glass of something a night but even this is sugar and calories I don’t need
It’s not going to be simple and it’s not going to be easy but it’s about retraining my eating habits and my move-my-fat-ass habits.
But I do want it to be healthy and positive, focusing on better health and fitness, not a dress-size or even a weight. I don’t want to feel like I am depriving myself of food (which would be shit food), I need to feel like I am boosting my well-being with good food.
I might be naive but I’ll reassess and adjust as I need to because I need a place to start and this is it.
I’ve already made a bit of a start…
- I’m walking as much as I can rather than using the car, I am thinking about how I eat, I’m reflecting on whether I am actually hungry when I want to grab a snack – and I’m making it fruit if I do need something.
- I’m not eating late in the day and I am not drinking a lot of booze.
- And because I am more mindful of my eating, I am stopping when I am full so I don’t always need to finish my plate.
- For the first time ever I am not launching into a ridiculous get fit regime which I hate and which I get bored of after a fortnight – this has to be about permanent change and about making it work for me – I have no desire to run a marathon or to be transformed into an athlete, I just want to make more healthier choices.
I already feel a bit better – more motivated and happier that I am doing something to make a few positive changes.
So I’ll be updating my progress, talking about any easy bits, all the tough bits and what I learn along the way. And you can also head over to my other blog: Do Life On Purpose for more updates about food, exercise, successes and failures. I am also on Instagram: @birthandbaby